When describing their marriage crisis, many complain that they feel the alienation of their loved ones. And even if a couple spend enough time together (joint walks, dinners, going to cinema, etc.), it doesn’t improve their relationship. Because they talk about anything – politics, weather, children, friends, works – but their feelings. Annoyance, discontent and resentment pile up and the situation seems hopeless. In truth, there is a way out and it’s possible to save marriage starting today.
The main task in this case is talking, sharing your emotions and experiences – both negative and positive ones. It’s not always easy because in order to get everything, piled up in you, off your chest to your loved, you have to overcome confusion and uneasiness. However, there are some accessible and painless methods for couples. It will help to reach harmony, save your marriage and make it happier.
Only 2 minutes per day are enough for you to have a productive heart-to-heart conversation with your partner. It’s even not a usual conversation but rather an exercise which requires strict observance of all regulations – and only then it will truly be effective. This exercise especially helps those couples who feel that they have distanced from each other. You shouldn’t get the situation to its culmination – it is advised to act according to the manner “the sooner the better”.
How To Do The Exercise
Spouses need to take a comfortable position on the sofa. They should be located in the way where one of them is sitting with his/her back to another – and it is he/she who will be talking about their troubles. The purpose here is that the speaker couldn’t see the face of his/her partner. The other one is the listener…and he/she doesn’t utter a word. Their aim is just embracing and holding the speaker in their arms.
This exercise lasts 2 minutes. Over that time the speaker is relating anything he/she kept mum about. The issues like getting through the day, personal impressions, desires, etc. The listener hears out the partner but neither objects nor supports them. Everything the listener can do is embracing… by means of which they express their support, love and consent. After 2 minutes they should stop the session and let the other partner to have their say.
It is very important not to interpret this exercise as foreplay. For that it’s better to find another time. One should take the exercise very seriously – the listener must be aware of what their partner doesn’t like and make some conclusions. It’s better to postpone discussing the revealed problem, carefully considering everything in advance.
At the end, if all rules have been observed, the relationship between couple improves and they get along. Annoyance and resentment don’t pile up anymore as feelings now have the outlet and those, who release them, receive a good support in the form of embrace they so need. During first exercises one might feel some confusion, but with time partners will get used to it and sharing thoughts and feelings will become easier as its effect will be obvious.
Some feelings, emotions, and experiences may come as a surprise for another half, who often even doesn’t suspect what concerns their loved have.
This exercise should not be done every day, but as the need arises, on average 1-2 times a week. It is excellent way for spouses to be heard out and listen to each other, which is becoming so rare in everyday life of many couples. At least give it a try.